Quote and Credit

Quote and Credit


Miles Labs Mrs. Shatwell and Nervine for the Blues

Dr. Miles may tell the jokes, but the joke is on you.  The man responsible for lauded legend "Miles Laboratories" was a snake oil salesman who gave away these real knee-slappers in order to advertise his "Nervine" for "spasms, fits and St. Vitus' dance"  all which are bad enough for you to seek a cure.  You'll grab for anything, even Dr. Miles Nervine which was also good for hysteria, sleeplessness and the blues.

It was so strong, it ALMOST made the jokes funny. 

Actually, as the recipe for Nervine seems to have disappeared like liver spots after a tonic, I had to dig around a bit.  Nervine was made out of Bromine, a product today used in pesticides and as a gasoline additive.  Ask the Tea Party if we need the FDA.  You know?  I wonder if that nutty Dr. Rand Paul found his Dad's supply back in a Kentucky shed.  His official photo here certainly looks like he got in the medicine chest..that is a relaxed expression if I ever saw one.
Miles made money on Nervine, of course, but the big bucks came when their bubbly mixture Alka-Seltzer™ had the good fortune of being introduced around the same time Prohibition was repealed.  Do you have any idea how many hangovers have been created since 1931?

Miles Labs ran from 1884 to 1979...when Bayer AG bought it in order to acquire another miracle cure, Flintstones™ vitamins!  Yes, Miles was famous for foisting Flintstones™ vitamins on the kids.   "Here.. eat a DINO, you'll feel better and pills are always good for you."

In 1995, Bayer AG removed all references to Miles on their products, as the population who remembered getting drunk on Nervine were all dead by then.
Here Mrs. Shatwell  (SHATWELL?  Are you sure this isn't a testimonial for  laxatives?) provides stirring evidence her insanity was cured by a Miles product.

Wait a minute...do I need to put a ™ after Shatwell?  It is available?  GREAT.  Call my lawyer pronto! 

Also shown here is Mrs. Love from Wigger Street, who drank NINE bottles. 
Now as for Nervine?  It is today a generic term for anything which affects the nerves.  You'll find all manner of wacky natural herb concoctions claiming to do it, including stalwarts of medicine such as Skullcap, Desert Pulsatilla, Western Moonwort, Monkeyflower and Golden Smoke. 

Dr. Miles Joke Book No Date Collection Jim Linderman


1 comment:

  1. My doctor used to have me take Nervine. He strongly suggested combining it with the smoking of menthol cigarettes. That and 1 or 2 drops of gin.