Quote and Credit

Quote and Credit


Conway Twitty Turducken Topped with Fruit! Horrors in Wax #15 The Terrible Taste of the Twitty Burger!

This is the 15th "Horror in Wax" I have posted. Some of you may think I have been running out of wax statues to disrespect, but not to worry, I've been holding Twitty in reserve. Wax Conway is shown here along with Wax Loretta, who is a saint I will not besmirch.

Twitty was really Harold Lloyd Jenkins, named after the silent film comic, and if you finish this post, you'll be laughing like the front-row at one of his flicks.

Actually, I am a fan of Conway Twitty as well, since he had the good taste to let a 17-year old Levon Helm play drums for him some 60 years ago. Twitty was raised near Levon's home in Turkey Scratch. Helena, Arkansas, holy ground for the meeting of Blues and Hillbilly music, being the original site of the King Biscuit Flour Hour Radio Show. But it is Twitty's LACK of taste this post is about.

Twitty had over 50 number one hits on the country charts. FIFTY. A record broken only by George Strait, another great singer I suspect less than 1 in 1000 New York City residents could name.

My main concern here is...TWITTY BURGER! Way ahead of his time, Mr. Twitty had another potential mine as gold as the most golden record...a hamburger topped with bacon. Yep...40 years before every chain today relentlessly promotes their killer bacon fatburgers on childrens TV, Conway was hoping to clog our veins with his own invention, but his had a special festive taste twist. Each Twitty burger was to come with a GRAHAM CRACKER CRUSTED PINEAPPLE RING on it. That's right. Straight from the land of fluffernutters, Twitty was able to persuade his friends to invest $100,000 each in his plan to cover the nation with hamburgers smothered in fruit from Hawaii.

As you would expect, (and as one day the turducken influenced KFC Double-Down will as well) the Twitty burger died a quick death. In a complicated legal battle with Uncle Sam, Conway was tried for fraud and such over the financing of the franchise, but he had the good fortune to draw a judge who loved the singer. The judge not only found in Twitty's favor, he sang Twitty a song he wrote for him after reading the verdict. All true in Wax Hell.

To read all the Horrors in Wax posts, click the blue subject heading below.

Wax Museum postcard collection Jim Linderman

1 comment:

  1. I can't believe I found this. Then I went rummaging through your archives looking for the "Lee Oswald Getting Shot by Jack Ruby" monstrosity. I was going to scan mine for you but you already have it. I lost my copy of that card, then spent years trying to find it again. Finally located it on eBay. Absolutely stunning. That has to be the sorriest excuse for an "exhibit" the world has ever known. Now you've inspired me to dig it out, blow it up and frame it. The Conway and Loretta is a classic too. I had no idea I had Conway to thank for all the BaconBurgers I've snarfed over the years. (Try 'em with cheddar, yum-bo-hungus!) Thanks, Jim!